


December 6: come through my window

by dizzy



Series: 2017 (the darkest timeline) daily fic advent [6]
Category: Glee RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-06
Updated: 2017-12-06
Packaged: 2019-02-11 15:53:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12938610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dizzy/pseuds/dizzy
Summary: prompt:Please do something about your cat it keeps breaking into my apartment via the windows and I don’t know how. Plus it knows how to open fridges





	December 6: come through my window

Darren's had a lot of roommates before. He's had a lot of shitty ones. 

He's had roommates that come and go all hours of the night. 

He's had roommates that would eat his food and not replace it. 

He's had roommates that just kind of casually started staying over more and more and never even mentioned floating him any cash for rent. 

He even had one roommate that would randomly crash in his bed and not even bother to wash the sheets after. 

He's just never had one that did all of those things, utterly without remorse.

(Also, he was never allergic to any of them.) 

*

"You," Darren says, standing in the doorway of his apartment. "You are a fucking cat." 

The cat seems aware. 

"How the fuck did you even get in here?" Darren asks, and then he spends twenty minutes figuring out that one of his windows won't latch properly and apparently this cat has some killer paw-eye coordination and can shove it up enough to actually get inside. 

Darren only realizes this because the cat decides he's ready to go home, and lets himself out. 

*

Darren puts in a ticket with his landlord to get the window fixed, but landlords have their own version of something that passes for time and Darren knows a window that won't latch is going to be bottom of the priority list. 

He starts to take Benedryl before bed every night and learns to wedge a chair against his fridge door. 

*

It's another four days before he actually sees the cat. 

It's walking across his living room when Darren opens the door, feet aching and guitar in hand. He needs better foot support if he's going to keep busking. 

"You little shit-" He says as soon as he sees the cat. 

The cat stops, eyes wide and startled, and stares at him. 

Then it bolts. 

Or at least - it tries to. It's not exactly the most lithe of beasts. 

In fact, it sort of... waddles... more than it walks. 

But it waddles right up to the window, then jumps up. It's belly sways as it makes sure it has good footing and then it manages to get it's paws up in just the right spot to crack the window. With a big enough gap it leans down and shoves it's head in the open bit and the window slides right up. 

"You little asshole," Darren says, voice full of pure admiration. 

The cat jumps out. Darren realizes just a few moments too late that he might be able to solve this mystery if he follows. 

By the time he makes it to the window, the cat is mysteriously gone. 

*

He manages to spot the cat twice more in the following week, despite trying a number of things to block the window. 

The cat is a boy, he's pretty sure, and it does have a collar and a name tag on. Darren just can't get close enough to see what it says. 

He's taken to calling him Tubbs, because - well. Because. 

"Come on, Tubby Tubbs," he says, quiet as he creeps in close. 

Tubbs is standing between the fridge and the door. There's a half-eaten piece of pizza clenched in it's jaws. It can't escape and also keep the pizza, so Darren's been granted a few minutes while the cat tries to prioritize. 

In the end, Tubbs lets go of the pizza and takes off toward the window - too fast for Darren to grab but at least slow enough for him to follow. 

He throws the window open just as Tubbs jumps down, and watches as... 

The cat jumps right in the window next to Darren's. 

*

Darren's never given much thought to this particular neighbor. They share a fire escape but Darren's never seen the person who lives there, and whoever it is hasn't submitted any noise complaints against Darren so that already makes it the most functional neighbor to neighbor relationship Darren's had in... well, ever. 

But now he's knocking on the door because if nothing else he needs this guy to know that his cat is a diabolical mastermind. 

He is definitely not expecting the person that answers the door to be a man that seems more or less his age, and somehow manages to make sweatpants, glasses, and a t-shirt look delicious. 

"Your cat," Darren says, which is not the most eloquent of ways to start this encounter. "Uh, I mean, hi." 

"Hi..." The man narrows his eyes. "You're from next door, right? And what did my cat do?" 

"Oh yeah, that's me - Darren. I'm Darren." He holds a hand out. It's gingerly accepted for a brief shake. "And oh, yeah. Your cat, man. Your cat is wild. I don't know how to say this in a way that doesn't sound totally made up, but-" 

"Chris. Let me guess: he's breaking into your place, eating all your food, and taking naps on your bed?" Chris sighs and turns around. "Really?" 

The last bit is directed at the cat, who is perched on the arm of the couch. 

"So he does this a lot?" Darren asks. He looks at the cat, who just looks back at him. "Tubbs, you really get around." 

"Tubbs?" Chris looks pained. "His name is Brian." 

"Brian?" Darren looks at Chris, then back at the cat. The cat - Brian, apparently - flicks his tail. "Okay, well, yeah. He had like half a slice of pepperoni earlier. And I'm out of Benedryl-" 

"You're allergic to cats?" Chris looks slightly alarmed. "I'm sorry-"

"No, it's cool, it's cool," Darren says. Yeah, that itch behind his eyes is totally cool. Nothing worth disturbing Cutie McNeighbor Face over. "I really just wanted to make sure you knew you have an escape artist on your hand." 

"Yeah, he used to do that to the last neighbor, too. Except she'd just feed him and give him milk. Cats aren't supposed to have milk, by the way, please don't give it to him. I'm the one that has to deal with the gas later." 

"Noted," Darren says. "You know, you could, uh... come have coffee with me. We could discuss this matter more." 

"Are you-" Chris jerks back around to look at him. "Are you hitting on me? Were you using my cat as a way to pick me up all along??" 

"Uh..." Darren wasn't, actually, until just now. But he gets the feeling it sounds better if he pretends it wasn't spur of the moment. "Maybe?" 

"That's-" Chris's mouth twitches. It's almost a smile. "That's new." 

"Hey, look. We live next to each other," Darren says. "Let's just have coffee. You know. Hang a little. Friends, if nothing else." 

"Right now?" Chris asks. 

Darren shrugs. "I'm off work for the day, I'm free. So yeah, if you want to. Right now." 

Chris hesitates, then reaches out and grabs his jacket. "Let me go get my phone."

He leaves the room to get it, abandoning Darren to Brian's blank stare. "Hey," Darren says, dropping down to a crouch to talk to Brian. "If this works out, you can help yourself to the pizza." 

*

(It works out.)

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on [tumblr](http://alittledizzy.tumblr.com)! or [twitter](http://www.twitter.com/alittledizzy)! or don't! your choice! happy holidays!


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